the joys of motherhood

some may be shocked to learn that i want to have 8 kids. ok, that's quite a lot of delivering for me to do, so i hope for a minimum of 5..
why so many children? for one thing, i'm the only child and i really want to expend my family. and for the other reason, i simply love children.
these are all my darlings. some of them grew up with me. i spend my holidays in kl with my nephews and nieces. so, they are really attached to me.

there is a big difference when a child grow up with you. see, Irshad, (the 2nd picture) was in ipoh till he was about 2 years old. i used to spend every weekend with him. and sometimes he even demanded to see me during the weekdays. once he shifted to kl, i started spending my holidays in kl with him and his brother. now in form 1, he is still so close to me. he is a very extremely shy boy, but because he grew up with me, he is not akward to be close to me.

and imran (the 1st pic) he really is a charmer. i still remember the times when he used to come and sleep on me. and he is just so sweet with his words even till now. recently i baked him a cake, and he told me 'soon, you will be baking for secret recipe' sweet right. when he was much smaller, he once told his mother 'you baked the best pizzas in the world, but pizza hut is nicer'.

i dun have a picture of shameer but i will upload it someday. but i have one of his brother, shamser (last picture)..both are so highly entertaining and i just have fits of laughter with them.

and my 2 darling girls, aishah and ameera, there's simpply no words to describe the joy of being with you. aishah touched my heart in so many ways.. she wrote a love letter to me telling me how much she loves me (i still keep it) and she is always so thoughtful of others. a real good kakak. and ameera, your smiles bring joy to me even when i'm most tensed.

children, they show their affection in love in the most unexpected ways. aishah and shamser would just suddenly come up to me and hug me. irshad and imran's constant question to me is always 'when are you coming to kl' and when i've spent days and weeks with them and are about to come back to ipoh, they'll immediately ask 'when are you coming again?'

one of my greatest pleasures of life is to watch you children grow up. and that more than anything is the reason why i really want many kids. in fact, one of the reasons why i don't want to be a doctor is because i dont want my future children to be neglected due to my career.

seems like i'm desperate to be a mother right? well, i have no rush to have a bf or a husband, but i have such a longing to be a mother..i wonder why? maybe because i've had a glimpse of the joys of motherhood.