Saturday, January 29, 2011

A life of secrecy


I have lived without facebook for a month now, and i'm still alive. The absence of facebook have perhaps kept me in a bit of oblivion since i am not up to date with all the events and other happenings, but compared to the good it has brought me, i should and will NOT complain.

I no longer open my FB homepage immediately upon opening my laptop, nor do i waste hours on FB. Most importantly, i am spared the misfortune of reading some not-so-nice updates by other people. also, i myself no longer need to worry about what i'm telling the world, or what aspects of my life are revealed by my friends on fb.

I feel secure. Sometimes it's so good to keep a distance from others. FB does not always connect people, at times, it separates them.

Now, I feel that I live a life of secrecy. No one knows much about me, what else about how i feel. And since i take months or even years to let out my true exact feelings even to friends who are closests to me, i'm really enjoying this secret life I'm leading. All of a sudden, i feel like this mysterious girl, a girl who is slowly disappearing from the public eye. What I do and what i think are matters to be shared only between me and Him. I may of course let out statements such as 'I'm tired after practices', "I still have the whole assignment to write and its due in 2 days!' and bla, bla, bla...but these are hardly matters which can be considered personal. I believe in time, I might even become more quiet (we'll see if that really happens).

One of my main aims in Warwick is to have minimal conflicts with others. So far, there hasn't been ANY conflict (as far as i'm concerned), and i plan to prolong this condition for as long as possible. The absence of FB helps me to achieve this.

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